Monday, April 30, 2007

at the park

I ran at quarry park this morning and it felt weird to go before work. Weird in a wonderful, I'm still-sorta-on-vacation-and-connecting-with-nature way. I didn't bring my ipod and the time went surprisingly fast, especially since it was just me and the occasional squirrel or rabbit rustling in the leaves.

I ran one part on a mountain bike trail and you run up this huge rock and you think, how am going to run up this rock? but then you do and you look around and think, I'm on top of this huge rock in the middle of this nature park in town and it feels damn good.

I can't wait to go back to the park... it doesn't open until 8 a.m. each day and I keep thinking, damn I wish it was open earlier so I can always go before work because it's not often that I can go in late. So then I start thinking about the next time I'm going to run there and maybe I should try some of the other mountain bike trails or the nature preserve and really explore it during a long run.

And then I think, how am I going to run another half marathon road race if I keep running at the park? But then, in my defense, running up a huge rock should count for training.

Distance: Between 2.7-3 miles.
Time: 30 minutes.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

ahhh vaca

Well, I'm back from my much-needed vacation with D and I think that not only are we better and stronger as a couple, but I'm much more relaxed and ready to go back to the crazy-stressful world of my work. (Especially since, it appears, my role - but luckily not my job - is in flux right now).

We ate vaca food -- some good stuff, but lots of munchies, desert, some fries, etc. What saved us, I think, was the amount of activity we did. And I loved it!

No running -- except for the first morning before we left for the long drive north -- but we hiked every day once we got up there for 1 - 3 hours. We went on a 10 mile bike ride. We played frisbee golf. Some days, my legs were sore (although not overly sore) from the activity.

It just felt so damn good.

The weather was perfect, the lodge was wonderful, the scenery beautiful. I could really relax!

I love nature! :-)

Saturday, April 21, 2007

the half marathon.

Ahh, my first half marathon.

Despite all the worries pre-race -- me knees hurt, my big toes hurt, I never ran more than 11 miles training (or ever) -- I did it. I did it and I'm so amazingly proud of myself.

The race itself started off slow, I ran the first two miles at a 12 mile pace with mom. I did this on purpose -- I wanted to make sure to pace myself. And I wanted to run with her because the next 10 miles were on my own.

Running with the pack was fun, and I enjoyed it through the first half. I finally got the hang of drinking at water stations and I kept a good pace, probably close to a 10:30 or 11 minute mile. I was feeling good and there were plenty of people around me.

I cross the half-way point at 1:06 -- an awesome time. An average of a 10:55 minute mile. Woohoo!

But then I saw the bathroom and I panicked. I didn't really have to go, but then I kinda did. Was this my last chance? What if I had to go at the next mile with no loo in sight? When was the next potty?

So I weaved off and stood in line ... for eight agonizing minutes.

In the end, I'm glad I used it. But when I returned to the race the pack had thinned. Where were all the groups?

So the last half was a power of will and sore legs. I took more walking breaks than I expected. I ran the last 6 at an average of a 13:33 minute mile, way down from my cruising pace before. And the thing was, I was passing people, slowly, with walking breaks, but I was.

I walked a lot those last few miles. It was so hard. My legs were stiff and sore and cold. It was hard to stay motivated -- there were few people around, and those that were were struggling. How did I end up at the very end of the pack?

It was so different than running alone. Alone on the trails -- or with D or my mom -- I felt like I was going fast. So fast. But I read after that the average person completed the race in 2 hours -- a half-hour faster than me! It was tough to stay motivated, except that all the families and volunteers and cops were so nice. They cheered me on and made me smile!

I got a new boost of energy when the rain began falling at mile 11. I only had two more miles to go, I was so close. It was refreshing, at least at first. I could do this. But then I was cold and wet. Sure, it had sprinkled a bit at the beginning, but this was an all-out downpour. It even hailed a little.

Memories of my boss came back to me, with a smile, as he would kindly say -- when it dipped below freezing or snowed 5 inches -- "Today could be race day! This weather could be race day!" Those simple words had prepared me for this.

And so, with a few short walking breaks, I crossed the finishing line. They called out my name and I was so proud!!

I had done it! Three months of built up and three months of training and I had finished my first half marathon!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And then they wanted me to bend over and unlace my clip.

hahahahaha yeah right.

Thankfully a kind volunteer untied it while I sat down. I was so stiff, so sore. I walked a bit, stretched a bit, ate some fruit they provided and watched for mom, who made it in 3:03.

She wasn't the last one -- but she thought she was last. I was so proud of her! She was smiling so big at the end, I just loved it.

A kind volunteer on a bike named Tom road with her when she got separated from the others so she knew the course. She could have made some short cuts -- others did -- but she didn't. She wanted to go a full half marathon. And she did! And she stayed positive the whole way!

She said knowing I would be waiting at the finish line helped. For me, knowing someone was there to celebrate with helped.

I'm so proud of us!

Then we got free 10 minute massages, went home, showed, iced some sore muscles and went out to lunch, walking oohh so slowly. I think I smiled the whole afternoon, all those good endorphins.

And you know what? We started talking ... about the next race.

... about how we could train better.

... about how I could run under 2:30, maybe even do an 11 minute mile pace (2:24:06) or maybe, if I pushed hard this summer or next year, close to a 10 minute mile pace (2:11:00)

... about what kind of race we should do next, a 10K? Suddenly a 5K doesn't seem like such a big deal!

I'm just so happy right now.

Who would have thought this goal -- which really started because D was on deployment and I needed something to do at night, to accomplish for me -- would become something I enjoy so much.

Who would have thought? :-)

YAY!

I DID IT!!

I ran and finished my first half marathon!

My official time is 2:36:54, which is an 11:59 minute mile pace.

Minus out my 8 minute bathroom break, and you get 2:28:54, which is an average 11:22 minute mile pace -- the speed I actually ran it at!

YAY!

Sunday, April 15, 2007

knees...

I am getting increasingly worried about my knees. I have determine, through no scientific or medical professional opinion, that I injured my iliotibal bands. At least thats what the books say, when there's a dull ache in the outside of your knees.

So ice and stretching is suppose to be the cure. But I'm worried ... the race is Saturday. Six days away.

So yesterday I did nothing. Today I walked two miles and tooled, sooo slowly, around on my bike. Which needs a tune up and some adjustment, as I think it's too small. But I don't want to admit that I bought a bike that's too small for me, I have to think that the bar is just too high. Because it was so expensive - $750 i think.

That's a *bad choice don't listen to the salesman advice* rant for another day.

Anyway.

I'm going to go 2-3 miles Monday and Wednesday, and then just ice every day and stretch before the race.

I'm nervous enough as it is for the race ... and now this.

Friday, April 13, 2007

race day a week away

One week from day, I'll be at the race expo, picking up my race gear.

One week from tomorrow, I'll be going the full 13.2 miles on race day.

This came quickly!

So now I have to figure out the best ways to rest my knees ... ice? stretching? ... while "tapering" ... while carbo-loading ... while still running a few "easy" miles ...

My Mom (who is running the race with me) asked why we need to do all these special things the week before the race. "I know I can do it," she said, "so why do anything special?"

Because it's the race day, that's why!

Thursday, April 12, 2007

5 miles

Guess what I did?

Run 5 miles.

Guess where it hurt?

Yeah... my knees.

Distance: 5 miles
Time: 56:40
Avg. Pace: 11:20
Course: Mississippi River trail.
Conditions: 45 degrees, slightly windy, partly cloudy.

today

I'm back down to 129! Yay! Two more pounds to go until I'm back down to 127.

This post is to remind myself of my dedication to running and the half marathon.

I have logged a lot of miles since January, when I started writing them down. But as of late I have faltered... and there's only 10 days until the race.

10!

It's Thursday. It's suppose to be 40 and partly sunny. I will go running after work today. I will. Period.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

glass half empty

I took another day off from running today. My eating was better, but not there yet.

Today I needed to focus on my emotions.

This morning I was so mad. Mad at him not attending a family event with me this weekend, mat at the deployments, mad at D's house for not being done, mad at his mom for being an alcoholic and making poor decisions. I was so mad at D for leaving me again, after he was barely home, for a vacation.

And so our wonderfulness began to unwind.

I tried to express my frustrations. All he heard, and seemed to want to communicate, was that he felt we were different. That maybe we should take a break. How unfair it was that after his deployment I was bringing this up, now, while he was on vacation.

But all I was having was a weak moment. A moment when I needed someone to say, it will be okay. The deployments over, it will be back to normal sooner rather than later. That the house is so close to being done, we'll be bbqing there this summer.

I needed him to be optimistic. I have been so strong, so optimistic, our constant cheerleader. I have played that role well over the last six months.

Today, I faltered. Today, I needed him to be optimistic.

But no. Because that's not who he is. He's a pessimist, to the core. So again I had to play the optimist when he started talking about taking a break. I had to be my own cheerleader until, finally, after hours, he said something that gave a sparkle of hope.

That the house would be done this summer. That taking our own vacation in two weeks would be good for us.

Which is great. But more than anything, today's events make me questions us. I can be strong, I've proven that. But I can't be strong alone.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Grrr

So we thought D would run the half marathon with me a week from Saturday. Aparently we thought wrong.

Turns out he has drill that weekend.

His sgt. say they have "accomodated him enough" with him being gone the last six months.

Ahem.

He wasn't on vacation. He was ... ahem ... on deployment.

So it looks like it'll just be my mom and me on race day ... which is fine. I knew that was always a possibility, although I was really hoping D would be either cheering me on in the crowds or running next to me.

He said he'll be back probably next Thursday from Texas, which means he'll be here a whole day before he goes up to do drill. So really, it's two and a half weeks before he's home home.

And he wondered why it was so hard to welcome him home and then turn around and say goodbye.

Sigh.

fooooood

So Easter and all those damn chocolate bunnies and eggs and jelly beans caught up with me.

I weight in at 131 this morning -- up 3 pounds from Friday and 4 pounds from the week before. Even though I ran 8 miles on Saturday. And I can tell. My pants feel tight.

Which means I need to start regulating my eating again, because I know that it wasn't just Sunday that got me. It was Saturday too, and all last week when I ate chocolate bars (instead of just pieces of them) and tacos and two rolls instead of one. I ate more than I normally do, and the only thing I can reason why is because D was home and I was probably seeking out comfort food.

Comfort food? I know it doesn't make a lot of sense ... except that last week, with his homecoming, there was a lot of changes. Quickly. He came home and his stuff took over my apartment. He wanted to go out to eat instead of cook a healthy meal or have the quick frozen burrito that I have been eating for dinners sometimes. He took over my car and I packed pb&j instead of going for co-op soup or subway during lunch. We went for bagels for breakfast and take-out for dinner and I ate the whole thing. He brought home delicious, huge white country buns that I normally would never have bought, let only eat a whole one, but I did.

Which means, I'm just going to need to be more aware of the portions that I'm eating. There's no reason to stop all that I ate this week -- hell, I'm so excited he's home and I've been missing going out to dinner and cooking with him and such -- but I just need to eat about half of what I ate.

Monday's run
Distance: 3-ish miles (probably 3.2 miles)
Time: 35 minutes
Conditions: 40 degrees, sunny, slight wind.
Course: lap warm up/cool down around the park, up to the watertower and back.
Note: My knees kind of hurt on the outside, first on the left and then on the right. I think it may have to do with running on the concrete sidewalk. I will need to investigate.

Monday, April 09, 2007

8 miles

I slept very soundly last night, the first time I have since D came home. I wonder if it was because he was not there; he's enroute (or probably there already) to his father's place in Texas. Being reuinted after a six month deployment is by no means easy, although I'm so glad I have the challenge!

Easter was an eating fest, off-set slightly because of my 8 mile run Saturday morning. I ran on a trail near my parent's house, then two miles of hills, then another mile on the trail. I probably would have gone two more miles except I saw it was noon and my brothers were suppose to be ariving before 1 p.m.

But despite my shorter mileage, I'm proud of what I did. I could have not gone. There was plenty of excuses to be had -- it was cold (20 degrees) it was windy (making it feel like 5 degrees) I was on a mini "vaca" because of the holiday. But I knew I wanted to eat (and eat I did) and I knew it would make me feel better.

And you know what? I felt fabulous after I ran.

Distance: 8 miles
Time: 1:32:00
Avg. Pace: 11:30 min. mile.
Conditions: 20 degrees, sunny, windy. Dressed in tights and wind pants, long sleeve wick-away, sweat shirt and winter coat outer shell, hat and mittens.
Course: 5 miles out-and-back on trail at parent's house, two miles hills, one mile out-and-back on trail.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

winter weather

Well, my pants are tight again. And I'm back up 2 pounds to 129. For the second day.

Sigh.

I've been eating crap, so I should expect it. Sure, the co-op food is good. But all the extra cheese, extra bread and ice cream from dairy queen ads up. Quickly, aparently, with the lack of running.

But it's been such crappy weather outside!

I woke up to snow. SNOW! Grr... All I want to do is run in beautiful spring weather and there's an inch of snow outside.

Guess I'll be running in beautiful WINTER weather today.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Home again!

He's home!

And we went running together!

I'm sooo happy.

He's at the base in-processing (or whatever the call it) and I'll see him again in two days. For a few days, then he's visiting his father for a week and a half, and then .. and then he's home-home. For good.

YAY!

We went today on the trail, even with the non-stop drizzle, and it was so much fun. We went at "my" pace, which is a pace slightly faster than I normally go. Which is good! And I honestly thing it wasn't "too" slow for him, which I was worried about. We both got a good workout.

And I have to say, it was nice running with him. It was so good to have him home, after all this time. I love him so much.

Distance: 4.8 miles
Time: 51:35 minutes
Avg. Pace: 10:45 min. miles.
Conditions: 50-ish degrees, slight drizzle.
Course: Beaver Island Trail, with taking the trail-trial route with D.